Perfection of Thought
by TheDragonLover
Summary: With an important event heading Dialga's way, he has to deal with Arceus' torture of having Ho-oh "perfect" him. But what if he doesn't want perfection? He prefers being lazy over anything, anyways. "Procrastinators unite...tomorrow!" Update: 3rd Chapter.
1. Summer Wind

_After writing my first Healshipping, I decided I had to make a story because I'd fallen in love with the pairing. FYI, Healshipping is Dialga/Ho-oh, and if you don't like it, you can leave now, _or_ you can stay and perhaps figure out why _I_ like it so much. The oneshot was fun to write and it was definitely fun to RP, so now I'm moving on to a full story._

_Note that this is different from my "DL and Legendary Friends" story, for Ho-oh is a girl in here. In that case, some things are going to be different here compared to that story. _

_Heal is the main pairing – although StarFireshipping (Groudon/Palkia) is hinted throughout – so expect it to focus on those two a lot. _

_At the beginning of each chapter, to use the great technique of Funke and to-love-is-to-lie, I will put a quote that has to do with perfection. Just thought it would fit._

* * *

"The summer night is like a perfection of thought." ~Wallace Stevens (1879 - 1955)

* * *

A long, scaly lavender pink tail was slumping over the side of the couch as the armored dragon sat on it, eating roasted chestnuts and his pale carmine eyes glued to the television screen. His long neck had a blade on his spine that jutted out as if to stab someone, and the armor around his face ensured its safety and intact. Two wings that seemed much too small to hold him three feet from the ground were folded along his back, and his bulky shoulders inset with pearls were hunched as he ducked his head low to keep his entire mind and body focused on the show he was watching.

"_Oh, Carla, I can't leave you here!"_

"_Go on without me, darling! I've got to save the tower!"_

"_Well, I'm not leaving without you!"_

An unexpected clatter of big, metallic footsteps, and someone asked from behind him, "Is that _As the Brass Tower Burns_ again, Palkia?"

The pink dragon started and nearly dropped the remote at the smooth voice, but he turned around to look over the couch and see his brother standing there with a look of obvious repulsion towards one of Palkia's favorite soap operas. He had Egyptian blue scales hard as diamonds (if not harder) with a metallic frame for wings on his back. Three claws of steel on each foot and something like a tower on his head, he looked almost like some sort of dragon-styled Frankenstein to the Spatial Pokemon. He kept the opinion to himself, though, and just grinned at the sour dragon as he went back to his show.

"Is there anything important I need to do?" Dialga asked it with such reluctance that his brother was sure he had just woken up – it was 2 in the afternoon.

"Yes – there was a meeting five hours ago that you didn't attend," he grinned at the groan he induced from that statement, "and I think Ho-oh was looking for you."

"…Ho-oh?" The Temporal Pokemon frowned at the reminder of the rainbow-colored turkey who seemed destined to turn the entire world into a utopia of her fantasies. "What does she want with me?"

Palkia shrugged. "I don't know; she didn't tell me when I asked," he furrowed his eye-ridges, "saying something about 'not perfect enough' or something like that." He then rolled his eyes and went back to his show, promptly ignoring his brother to instead be fascinated by his favorite actress' corny lines.

His brother then rolled his eyes and scoffed at him before turning and walking off, deciding that he would talk to Ho-oh later. Right now, however, he was going to take a nice, long, hot both and –

_Ding-dong!_

_Arceus Judgment it all!_ The Dragon/Steel-Type turned irritably to the front door, wondering aloud, "Who the hell is it? And right when I was going to go relax…."

"Probably your girlfriend," Palkia snorted from the couch.

"Probably _yours,_" he retorted with a smirk before continuing to the door, wondering again at the oddity of owning a human-like house. Well, actually, to be correct, the humans had copied off of _them_, but they didn't know that; they just _thought_ that they had made it originally, and the Pokemon didn't feel like correcting them. Besides, they probably wouldn't believe them now, so there was no point in even trying. As Dialga could nearly hear his brother scowling, he grinned as he stepped up to the door and, after a thought, peeked through the eyehole to see who it was before he opened the door.

Standing there while constantly ruffling her feathers as if they couldn't stay the way she wanted them to, a brilliantly colored bird stood at the door. With four golden feathers crowning her as if she was a queen, orange-red, white and Kelly-green-feathered wings and huge fan-like tail, and a smooth snow white stomach, she seemed to be the epitome of perfection. It was no wonder that she was thought of as the "Ruler of the Sun" or the "Sun God" – she was just as brilliant as the golden disc soaring in the sky. Propped up on dainty Yale blue legs, her golden poppy-colored beak clicked in distaste for waiting as her carmine eyes scrutinized the door, as if it too was too imperfect for her.

The dragon rolled his eyes before reluctantly unlocking and opening the door, feeling a faint summer breeze as he muttered to the bird, "Yes, Ho-oh?" Ignoring his brother's "told ya", he asked, "What do you want?" He really didn't want to deal with her "perfection" this early in the – afternoon.

She glanced his quadruped form up and down, making him a bit nervous, before she snorted and told him, "For you information, imperfect lazy one, _you_ missed the meeting this morning."

"Yes…." He blinked at her in indifference. "And your point is…?"

She narrowed her eyes and ruffled her back feathers a bit, standing tall and regal before me. "That meeting was important! It was only me, Rayquaza, Giratina, Arceus, Palkia and – well, _supposed_ to be you!" She looked rather disheveled as if she had fought the air currents to get there, and she glared at him as he stood there in silence.

When he didn't respond after a minute, she snorted and fanned out her wings, making a "U" with them as she squawked, "You're the keeper of _time_, for crying out loud! How can you be _late?_"

He grinned at her and replied cheekily, "Actually, I'm not late; everyone else is just early." As he watched her fume at his lame reply, he backed away from the door and made as if to close it, saying, "Well, since you have nothing of importance to –"

"Hold it!" She stuck out her wing to stop him, and he only obliged to avoid messing up her feathers (a homicidal perfectionist was never a good thing to be around) as he raised an eye-ridge at her. Her glare intensified as he was frozen to the spot, a bit afraid to move in case it caused her to go onto a rampage, and so she was allowed to step into the house as he hesitated. She stared at him with a raptor-like expression, making him shiver, and she scolded him, "A Legend of Time that can't keep track of it is a disgrace to all Legendaries!" She ruffled her feathers. "Either you straighten up your act, or I tell Arceus to put you out of service – temporarily."

He felt that, if this were a cartoon, his jaw would be touching the floor now.

"What?! You can't do that!"

"Oh, but I can." She seemed to smile smugly at him as she told him casually, "If I can get Arceus to force Groudon and Kyogre to work together…."

Dialga gritted his teeth as he glared at the bird. How dare she manipulate Arceus, worst of all to mess with _him?_ _That evil, self-serving perfectionist twit! Why, I oughtta…._ Instead of telling her what he ought to do, though, he stood up tall to tower more than five feet over her (she was 12 ft 6 in, which was small compared to his 17 ft 9 in) and snapped, "I can reverse time to make it so you were never created, and yet you threaten me? How amusing…."

She started to make something like a chirp, and it took him a moment to realize that she was laughing at him as her tail trembled in her mirth. As he fumed, she told him, "Oh, I know you can't do anything to me, imperfect lizard! Why, Arceus would skin you alive!"

_And despite that, I still want to do it._ He snorted at her, taking up a defiant stance, and retorted, "I don't need to listen to this – I have more authority than _you!_"

"Ah, ah," she would have wagged a finger at him if she had any as she grinned (despite the fact that, with a beak, that shouldn't be possible), "temper, temper, imperfect one. _That_ certainly isn't helping your situation here, you know."

"Oh, yeah?" He bared his dragon fangs, ready to bite her throat and stain her pretty little white stomach. "Well, _you_ aren't helping_ anyone,_ you pompous, oversized turkey!" As her eyes widened and lower jaw (beak?) dropped in shock, he smirked and said, "Oh, yeah. I went there."

Giving an indignant huff, she straightened up and scowled at him as he grinned. "Why, I never! The nerve of you oversized, overrated, imperfect lizard freaks!" He snarled at her as he dropped the smile, but she ignored it as she scoffed and turned away, saying as she stepped out of the house, "I might as well not tell you about the upcoming event that Arceus is planning!"

"…wait, what?" He blinked, then narrowed his eyes as she kept walking before grabbing her tail feathers with his teeth. As she gave a squawk and whipped her head around, he growled from around the feathers, "What are you talking about?"

She jerked herself from his grasp and huffed, ruffling her tail feathers in order to fix them before glaring at him. "I'm _talking_ about the day where we all make our appearances around the world!" She narrowed her eyes at him and scowled. "Or have you forgotten _that_ duty, too?"

"…But…I thought me and Palkia were exemptions."

"It's 'Palkia and I'," she corrected, "and he's decided that you have to do it, too, if only to sit around Spear Pillar for a day. And if you mess up – which includes killing any humans, breaking anything, etcetera – you're in heaps of trouble."

"What?" He took a step back in surprise, mouth wide open as he stammered, "How come I didn't know about this before?!"

She smiled smugly (Again, with the defying of physics….) .

"That's what this morning's meeting was about – we had just gotten informed of it."

"…Damn." As his gaze fell to the ground, he thought, _despite how annoying it is to say it, she's right about me being irresponsible._ He grimaced._ In fact, if she hadn't come to bother me about it, I wouldn't have known, since Palkia would never tell me._ Scowling at how the world seemed to be conspiring against him, he lifted his head back up to glare at the Rainbow Pokemon and snarling, "Well, I won't mess up – and besides, if I do, I can –"

"Arceus said no time-bending."

"_Daaaaamn!_" Stomping his giant dragon feet, he cursed every Legendary there was to date as the bird watched in amusement and triumph.

"What's going on in there," Palkia finally asked from his perch in the living room, boredom creeping in with his soap over. He was left on a cliffie, but he chose to wonder about his brother instead of the next episode, what with all of the yelling.

"None of your business," his brother shouted from the front door, glaring at the bird as she continued to smirk. He then whispered to her, "If you weren't under Arceus' "wing", so help me, I would –"

"Shush," Ho-oh flicked a wing over his mouth, effectively silencing him as she clicked her tongue and told him, "My, you _are_ imperfect. It's tempting to try to fix you…."

"I do not need fix–"

"Aha!" She chirped excitedly at the idea that had just come to her. "I will help you reach perfection before the big event! Yes, that sounds wonderful," she said to herself, completely ignoring the fact that he was right there in front of her and protesting to such an idea. "Well, in order to do that, I'll need help. I'll be sure to get my sister's assistance, and I might as well include Suicune and the others in this. So," she finally looked at him, as if just now noticing his presence, "we have a lot of work to do and not enough time to do so. Come to the top of Mt. Silver tomorrow at sun high, if you please. Oh, and by the way, imperfection," she smiled slyly at him, "I do indeed detest tardiness."

"But – I –" He was left standing there, mouth gaping as she turned and took off with a flutter of brilliantly sparkling wings and a warm breeze of summer, turning towards where Johto lay beyond the horizon before she slowly made her way out of sight. When she wasn't visible anymore, Dialga finally remembered himself and clicked his jaw shut to grind his teeth together in frustration. _That – that bird! Oh, how I want to throw her in an oven and bake her at ridiculous temperatures! I'll bury her in Groudon's volcano, I'll throw her into a Whirlpool, I'll toss her to the Mightyena! I'll –_

"What happened?"

He blinked away his thoughts, and then shook his head to dispel them further as he realized his brother was standing beside him with his dragon arms crossed, a grin that could match Rayquaza's on his face. After a moment of silence, Dialga frowned and muttered, "I feel like I've just made a deal with Darkrai…." He then scowled and turned around to go sulk in his room, leaving his brother standing there with a knowing look on his face.

"Oh, Arceus," the pink dragon chuckled, "this is better than my soap operas!"

* * *

_Did you enjoy that? ;P I hope so, cuz it was fun to write! Now, if you REALLY love me, you would review..... *hinthint*_

* * *

Lots of dragon-y love (and cookies!),  
~DL ('Dragon Lover')


	2. Failing in Different Ways

_This is the second chapter! *is all excited* I love this pairing to death, I don't know why! That oneshot was so fun to write, though, so maybe I just realized how awesome it was._

_Oh, and I _may _add some other references to pairings in here. . . like, I dunno, maybe one of Glory For Sleep's favorites. . ._

_Anyways, here's the second chapter!_

* * *

"Try as hard as we may for perfection, the net result of our labors is an amazing variety of imperfectness. We are surprised at our own versatility in being able to fail in so many different ways." ~Samuel McChord Crothers

* * *

Unable to fly, it was rather difficult to convince Arceus' "secretary", Shirley, to Teleport him to Mt. Silver–but eventually Dialga was able to persuade the Gardevoir by promising to in return get some of Palkia's soaps (after all, she had to do _something_ in her spare time) that he had recorded. The white-clothed greenhead flicked her hand as the other rested on his leg, and shimmering turquoise sparkles surrounded them making his head spin before, suddenly, they had arrived. A bit shocked at the quickness, he thanked her and watched her disappear in amazement, wondering, _can Palkia teach me how to do that?_ Shrugging it off, he turned around to survey his surroundings in search of the perfectionist that had brought him here.

A light flashing on the ground caused him to glance up and see the bird circling overhead, her brilliant feathers causing him to squint along with the sun's harsh light. When she finally alighted with a ruffle of her feathers, he found that she looked surprised, as if not really expecting him to come. She then told him, "You're early."

He scowled as if to blame her for such a thing and muttered, "You told me sun high, but not whether you meant sun high _here_ or somewhere else." He then shuffled his feet anxiously and a bit embarrassed after she pointed it out. "So, just to be safe . . . I came early."

". . . Oh." The soft sound barely made it out of her beak as she blinked in shock, still not able to comprehend him being early, before she shook her head and said matter-of-factly, "Well, that's a good start, so I guess we might make some progress today after all." She ruffled her feathers again, turned to pick something out of them with her beak, and then chirped, "Well! I suppose we should get started on your perfection, shouldn't we?"

Dialga gulped. "Yeah, umm, about that . . . can't I just call in sick that day and avoid the whole thing?"

"_What?_" Ho-oh scowled. "You can't get sick!"

"I can try!"

Ho-oh scoffed. "For someone who hates work, you're going out of your way to avoid it! That's just more work!"

"Is not," was all he muttered, and she rolled her eyes at his immaturity before turning and making something of a whistling sound. As he pondered over how she could manage to do that, the bushes nearby rustled a bit before two familiar faces popped out of hiding.

First in line was the water wolf, Suicune, which was expected; the canine was able to keep her counterparts under control, so she'd be a big help disciplining anyone that was considered unruly or irresponsible. Her light blue fur was silky and her purple "cape" well-kept, making her look stunning in the sunlight, and the snow white spots were flawlessly clean. Her slender legs fit her sleek profile, and she elegantly padded over as if she was purifying a lake to stand before him, her cherry eyes twinkling with some amusing secret.

Right behind her was her best friend, Latias, who giggled lightly before doing a loop-de-loop in the air and hovering just over his head. Shaped like a jet plane and just as fast, her feathers were glossy and wet with dew as if she had gone for a swim on the way there. (The Lake of Rage wasn't too far off, actually. The Red Gyarados probably had a heart attack.) Her roses-and-clouds-themed coat was flat against her body to make her completely stream-lined, and Dialga was sure he would never be able to escape if she was around, Teleport or not.

With the two girls before him, the Temporal Pokemon turned to Ho-oh and questioned, "Why are they here?"

"To aid in the perfection lessons, of course!" She gave him a calculating look, as if wondering what else he thought they would possibly be there for, before she chirped and turned to them, bouncing in place excitedly. "Alright, girls, it's time to help perfect this imperfect abomination!"

Latias, at the remark, frowned and mumbled, "That's not very nice . . ." She was shushed by the bird, though, and quickly forgot it as she was whispered instructions. With all of the secrecy going on, Dialga couldn't help but grow nervous, and it was only when their "huddle" dispersed that he felt any tension leave his muscles–that is until Latias turned to him and giggled once more. "Okie-dokie, artichokie! Let's hop to it!"

". . . Artichokie?" He frowned at the strange word. "What in the world . . . ?" He was distracted from the bizarre phrase when he asked her curiously, "So, what now?"

"Now," the young dragon answered politely, "we're going to work on manners!"

_Oh, Arceus, I knew it._ He steeled (haha) himself and told her sternly, "I don't need any working on. I'm _perfectly_ fi–"

"You are _not_ perfect!" The Rainbow Pokemon sounded furious as she shook her head vigorously. "You are nowhere _near_ perfect. _That's_ why you're here! Or did you forget?"

He gritted his teeth and resisted answering that question. _The sooner you play along, the sooner this is over, _he reminded himself. Taking a deep breath and counting to ten in his head, he then asked the Eon Pokemon, "Alright . . . what do I have to do?"

After a few trial sessions with Latias, Ho-oh stepped in and commanded, "Alright, now it's time for the perfection test. We have to make sure he was paying _perfect _attention." Glaring at him when he rolled his eyes at "perfect", she then glanced to Suicune and nodded her approval, and the water wolf stepped forward and stood regally in front of him. He had to admit, she looked beautiful, and the sunlight was very complimenting on her sparkling skin–but he wasn't here to compliment her. He was here to get Ho-oh to stop pestering him.

Once more, he steeled himself up for a tough examination. _Knowing that bird,_ he mentally grumbled, _I'll have to do a crabwalk before I've even gotten to the third question!_

Suicune looked him up and down with her cherry eyes before cooling stating, "Dialga." She looked so sophisticated, it intimidated him, and he almost forgot that he was supposed to answer her.

He gulped, but tried to look indifferent as he towered over her past ten feet tall. _This may be tougher than I thought._ He struggled to keep his voice calm as he nodded his head in recognition. "Suicune." And now that he had passed the introduction, he knew there was going to be hell, because that twinkle in her eyes returned and he found himself a bit frightened of it. Not enough to freak out and run, though; just the sort of feeling in your stomach that was disturbing and foreboding.

"Anything interesting happen today, Dialga?"

_Well, that's a bit of a vague question._ "Not a lot, actually, considering I haven't done much." A pause, and he added quickly, "How about you?"

A smile came across her face, and she replied, "Oh, the same for me, too. Other than Raikou and Entei's ridiculous antics, of course." She gave a small sigh at the mentioning of them, gazing into the distance. "You'd think Entei would be able to keep him under control, but when they're together they just seem to get into even more trouble."

Dialga grinned at the thought of what they had done last time she had left them alone together. "Where are they now, then? Not together, I hope."

She shook her head with a giggle. "No, I'm smart enough to learn after last time. This morning, I checked on Entei to see him roaming the Lake of Rage, and then I made arrangements with Latios and Mew to keep a watch on Raikou."

He frowned. ". . . Mew?" The hyperactive ball of pink fur that loved to prank Dialga when he was sure he wouldn't get caught?

"Yes, I asked him to help too." She smiled. "He can be useful sometimes, you know."

_How?_ Shaking his head slightly at the suggestion, he returned his focus to the situation at hand–claw. _Just have to pass this, and I'm home free!_

* * *

He felt like he had just been cross-examined in court in a murder case, not practicing his "perfection."

But finally, it was over, and he relaxed the tensed muscles in his shoulders when the blue canine took a step back to allow Ho-oh to walk before him, like a dictator before her followers. She narrowed her eyes at him, as if searching for weakness, but he refused to back down, instead standing tall and proud before the brilliantly feathered bird. His eyes settled on hers and shot back an intense stare that would have made lesser–less "perfect"–Pokemon tremble, bringing them to their knees to bow before his enormous body. Of course, she had stood her ground against Arceus, the creator of all, so she was not fazed by this display of testosterones.

"That was horrible!"

His jaw dropped at the blunt statement. He had been expecting criticism, but _this?_ Gritting his fangs in fury, he shouted, "What do you mean, "that was horrible?" I did everything that–"

"There is a difference," she interrupted coldly, "between parroting or copying someone like a Chatot or Ditto and actually following the rules. You can't just bob your head and go "yes, ma'am," "no, sir," and expect that to be okay!" She cast her wings above her in a "u" formation, shrieking, "You have to form an aura of importance, of legacy, that causes awe and disbelief in your presence! You have to make the air shimmer around you, make them feel as if the entire _world_ was cradled in your mighty claws–when it rightfully does! You have to cause fear and faith simultaneously when you unleash a mighty roar–and _this?_ You call _this_ being perfection among Pokemon?" She snorted. "You make me laugh."

Cold, icy rage racing through his veins and turning the highlights of his scales a dangerous yet faint yellow, Dialga roared, "What gives you the right to tell me what makes a legendary?" Stomping the ground once in emphasis, his eyes flashed with a hatred for the bird before him. "What gives you the right to come into my life and tell me that I'm completely and utterly wrong? That I, the Guardian of Time, existing ever since Time began _and even before then_, have been going down the wrong path all of this time?" When it looked like she was going to respond, he suspended her argument by continuing, "And what are you, Ho-oh? Huh? The Legendary of Beauty? Is that all you're good for? Preening yourself and fixing every damn feather that's out of place?"

She arched her neck back as if to strike him like an Ekans, but the sound she made was anything but malicious; it was the sound of disappointment. "_Oh!_ Why, I never–I have never met such a rude, selfish Legendary such as you. I thought that _Darkrai_ was a sheltered individual, but now I see that he's been surpassed!" She folded her wings beside her and looked at the blue dragon as if marveling such stupidity. "I can only imagine how you've come to the conclusion that you know everything in the world."

"I could say the same for you!" Snarling at the bird, Dialga turned himself around and shouted, "I'm leaving!" He turned away, ignoring the shocked look on Suicune's face and the disappointed look on Ho-oh's, but he was stopped by a desperate cry.

"But–wait!" Latias zoomed in front of him, eyes wide after witnessing the heated argument. "What about what Arceus–"

"I could give a damn what he thinks." Although he was furious, he didn't want to unfairly direct it at her, and so he gently pushed her aside with his snout before continuing his way off of the mountain. He didn't notice the way the rainbow-feathered bird acknowledge the action, or the way Latias examined the orange markings on his body in slight confusion and fear; all he knew was that he was going home, even if he had to walk all of the way.

As he tromped down the overgrown path humans used to travel on to get to the top, he grumbled to himself about the audacity of Ho-oh and her perfect prattle. _Stupid bird, thinks she's all that and knows everything. Who is _she_ to say that I'm doing it wrong? She's such a damn perfectionist, it's surprising she has _any_ friends!_ Mulling over how she managed to convince two perfectly (he snorted) normal Legendaries to accompany her on this insane expedition, his tail thrashed behind him and toppled a tree in the process. _I'm sure she blackmailed them or something, although I have no clue what in the world Latias would want to hide._

Then, after a few minutes of fuming and cutting down the pine forest, he slowed his pace and gradually stopped as he realized his folly. _Oh, Arceus is going to skin me . . . damn, I wish I was allowed to bend time without him noticing. Dammit, that was stupid. Dammit, dammit, dammit._ He sighed and closed his eyes, shaking his head at how he let his anger get the best of him. _Well, I'm not exactly "perfect" like I'd like to think I am._

". . . Dialga?"

He snapped his head up to look at the white-and-red dragon, grimacing when she winced at the quick action. Cooling his temper down the rest of the way, he cleared his throat and asked softly, "Yes, Latias?" He didn't want to frighten her anymore than he already had.

She bowed her head shyly, looking at the pebbles scattered across the path. "I . . . I don't want you to go home alone . . . can I come with you?"

Although touched by the sentiment, he had a sneaking suspicion that Ho-oh had set her up to it, but he nodded and let her trail behind him as he began the long trip home. He doubted she would stay with him all the way through, but he was grateful for even a few moments of companionship. To be honest, he respected Latias, for with all that she went through to please the humans of her hometown she was still cheery and joyful, a wonderful friend to have. He remembered the year that she had dyed her white feathers green in the spirit of the humans' winter holiday, recalling her brother's scolding even as he thought of it. _"You did _this_ just to look like a fool and have people laugh at you? That's the stupidest idea I've ever heard! I mean, this'll take _weeks_ to wash out, and–and–you're _green!_" _She had said it was worth it, though, if only because of the delight that sparked in the children's eyes as she gave them rides around the town.

"Dialga?" He turned to look over his shoulder at her, eyeing the curious expression on her face. "Can I ask you a question?" When he shrugged, she hesitated before continuing. "Do you . . . hate Ho-oh?"

He thought over his answer carefully, lest word got around that he had an attitude problem. After a minute of walking, he sighed and decided to just go with it. "Yeah, but I think I'm just mad at her." His gaze fell to the ground to examine the pebbles he passed on the road. _She's angered me more than Palkia ever has, even with his stupid soap operas. I need to watch my temper around her, or I might actually attack something!_

Tilting her head in thought, she eventually chirped, "Well, she means well. She's just . . . a little pushy about it, that's all. She wants the best for everyone!"

He mentally groaned, but he didn't let on to his doubts as he told her, "I believe you, Latias. I just wish she was as nice about it as you." He smiled as she giggled, putting wind chimes in a storm to shame at her musical laughter, and he realized he liked hanging out with her. _Maybe I should get out of the house more often, if only to talk to her. She's a great friend._ And the best thing was that he hadn't broken his back trying to be nice to her–it all came naturally, and in either case she was his friend at "hello."

_She's just a pure, wonderful person._

* * *

_Merry Christmas, everyone!_

Dialga: Make sure to help your family out at the dinner table tonight.

Ho-oh: And make sure to clean up every bit of wrapping paper!

Palkia: Have fun, be merry, and pig out tonight!

Latias: Be nice to everyone, even if you don't like them!

Suicune: And most of all, happy holidays.

* * *

_Lots of dragon-y love (and cookies!),  
~DL ("Dragon Lover")_


	3. Wonderful Evening

_Whoo, finally, chapter three! I'd been hoping to go faster with this story, with its shorter-than-my-average-updates chapters and all, but I guess you–never mind, I'm not going to make that lame joke._

_Ho-oh: What, you can't rush perfection?_

_*facepalm*_

_Oh, and yes, I know that Resident Evil Code: Veronica is a video game. I don't care. It should have had a movie adaptation._

* * *

"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." ~Groucho Marx (1890 - 1977)

* * *

It took the remainder of the day to get home, and by the time he had arrived at his front door he was exhausted from walking. He had sent Latias away when the sun was beginning to descend from its throne at the top of the sky, despite her protests, and finished the journey miserably alone. Trailing his metallic claws through the dirt, much like a Slaking dragged its lengthy arms, he was a sight for sore eyes as his eyelids slid halfway shut. _When I get in,_ he decided with a groan,_ I'm taking a nice, long bath._ Delighted at the thought of a long period of relaxation, he picked up a claw to rap on the door three times, hoping Palkia wasn't in his room watching reruns of _The Bold and the Beautifly_. Waiting impatiently to gain entry to his house (he had forgotten to place his key under the mat before he left), he was not expecting the door to open so quickly.

Or to see the person that had opened the door wasn't Palkia.

"Wow, you're quite the sight for sore eyes."

"Wha–_Ho-oh?!_" He took a step back in shock and horror. "How'd you–what are you doing in my house?!"

Amused by his exasperated tone, she twittered merrily, "Your brother let me in." As Dialga scowled, she continued, "He's cleaning up the imperfect _disaster_ in his room, since I've taken it upon myself to do the rest of the house." Ignoring his alarmed expression, she gestured a wing in welcome and told him, "I figured you'd want to relax, since you seemed agitated today, so I took the liberty of cleaning the bathroom first. No thanks necessary."

_Like I was _going_ to thank you,_ he mentally replied, keeping quiet as he entered and looked around at the cleaning equipment scattered about the hall. Everything from mops to dusters to glass-cleaner clustered around windows and tables, and he began to wonder if she was enlisting the help of magical elves or if she was going to use it all herself. Shaking his head at the perfectionist, he made his way to the bathroom and had to blink as the sparkling cleanliness stunned him. _Whoa, she wasn't kidding when she said she was cleaning. This place is spotless!_ Turning on the hot water, he glanced in the mirror and grimaced at the fatigued dragon that stared back at him. _And I _am_ a sorry sight. I need this bath._

A knock on the door interrupted his thoughts, and he looked to see Ho-oh stick her head in momentarily. He noticed the feathers atop her head were a bit ruffled, and some sort of black dust covered one side of her face, probably from cleaning. "I don't mean to bother you, but do you know where the bleach is? You have horrible, imperfect stains on your walls that I _must_ get out."

Rolling his eyes, he mumbled, "Here, I think it's under . . ." Sticking his head under the sink, he carefully gripped the white bottle by its handle with his fangs and awkwardly passed it to her. After a moment of clumsily moving their mouths, he finally had her balance it on her wing so he could let go of it. A bit perturbed by the embarrassing experience, he growled, "Having no hands sucks."

"I'm afraid I'll have to agree on that one." Shaking her head as if disapproving the idea of Legendaries having petty problems, she was turning to leave with the bleach when she caught her reflection in the mirror and gasped, just now seeing how dirty she was. "Oh! Now this won't do at all!" She cast him a hopeful, silent question, causing him to sigh exasperatedly.

"After you're done cleaning, and I'm done with my bath, you can use the bathroom."

"Oh, bless your soul!" Sighing gratefully, she thanked him before stepping out and closing the door behind her, careful not to drop the bottle. Rolling his eyes and muttering about women, he turned off the water and carefully stepped into it, hissing at first at the intense heat but soon giving his own satisfied sigh.

_If I close my eyes and think happy thoughts, I bet I can drown out her annoying chirping . . ._ Determined to not let the perfectionist's criticism get to him, he tried to block out any thoughts about her and ponder about other, more important things. Like the upcoming event Arceus had suddenly thrown him and Palkia into. _Didn't he figure that after the whole Team Galactic incident that it would be smart to _hide_ instead of strut our stuff? Or is he hoping that the humans will be in awe and simply bow down to us instead of capture us?_ He snorted at the thought, scrubbing his claws clean of the dirt from the regions he had crossed on the way home. _I don't have that sort of faith in those wretched mortals. They've caused so much damage, it's not even funny._

After rubbing away at his scales until he finally felt clean, he submerged himself almost completely underwater to let the tension in his muscles melt away. Closing his eyes and dipping his head under once, he shook away the water threatening to impair his vision and looked at the sparkling tiles that covered the three walls around the bathtub. His thoughts returned to the rainbow-feathered bird, unable to ignore her any longer. _You know, she's been acting strange since I've been here. Not "nicer," per se, but . . . different._ Frowning, he wondered if that was because her attention was focused on getting the house clean. _Maybe she has such a one-track mind that she can't keep her attention on multiple things at once. Or maybe, because she isn't "on the job," she's relaxing her perfectionist ways–or some of them._ It was all too confusing, and he shook his head to cast the puzzling thoughts away. _No, I'm going to _relax, _not worry over why Ho-oh is such a weird bird._

Ten minutes later, he was drying off and marveling at the way his scales shone in the bathroom light. Every inch of movement created a carnival light show, and he eyed the reflected lights on the walls and muttered, "I'm like an enormous disco ball . . ." Satisfied with his handiwork, he stepped out and gave a whistle for the bird. Instead, he came face-to-face with his brother as he stepped out of his room holding a duster. Furrowing his eyebrows, Dialga growled and questioned, "What were you thinking, you idiot? Letting her in here? She'll perfect us until there's nothing _left_ of us!"

Looking a bit uneasy, as if expecting Ho-oh to appear around the corner any moment, Palkia whispered to him, "But, dude, have you _seen_ her when she's mad? She's _scary!_"

"_Young man, open this door right now!"_

_The pink dragon paused on his way to the kitchen, frowning as he recognized the voice on the other side of the door. "Where's Dialga?"_

"_He stomped off a while ago, isn't he home yet? Whatever. I have important business to discuss with you, so open this door!"_

_Palkia crossed his arms as he leaned against the wall beside the front door, a small grin forming on his face. "I don't know, my bro might be a bit mad if I let you in . . ."_

"_Your brother? Palkia, if you do not let me in, I'll Sacred Fire this door and _your tail_ and _then_ we'll see if your brother's wrath is all that intimidating. I've learned from the best torturing minds, and I'm not afraid to make them _perfectly_ proud."_

_He gulped._

"_Which minds?"_

"She threatened to find the deepest, darkest hole on the ocean floor," he explained, "where I'd only have the company of the ancient Relicanth and hungry Sharpedo, and many, many other things that would give _you_ goosebumps." He shivered at the thought, looking as if he'd rather have his memory wiped of her threats, causing Dialga to raise an eye-ridge at his brother's behavior. Palkia wasn't the _bravest_ dragon he knew, of course, but he wasn't a giant Combusken. It took quite a bit to creep him out.

"Alright, fine, I'll kill you later for it." Shaking his head and giving a reluctant sigh, he was about go to his room to sulk in solitude when his brother stopped him with a claw on his shoulder. He glanced at him curiously and muttered, "What?"

The Spacial Pokemon gave him a thoughtful once-over, as if examining his posture to determine his thoughts. "You know, although she's terrifying when mad, she _is_ cleaning our house. You could be, I don't know, _grateful_ for that."

When Dialga snorted at the thought, his brother frowned, but the quadruped shook off his claw without a second thought and retorted, "Let Shaymin deal with gratitude, but keep _me_ out of it. All that bird causes is trouble." He then went off to his room, ignoring the eyes on his back as he grumbled to himself about how the entire world was against him. _Even my own brother! Some karma this is._

He frowned when he saw his door ajar, but when he stepped inside his jaw dropped in surprised horror. "Ho-oh! Get out of my room!"

She raised her beak without missing a beat, sweeping trash from under the bed as she told him, "I'm _cleaning,_ remember? This place is utterly_ disastrous._" She seemed to have gotten over her "hand"-icap rather well as she held the broom in one talon while balancing the other on the dustpan's handle. Brushing debris into a pile and making a thorough job of sweeping it up, she released the broom to lift the pan from the ground and gestured to him to grab it. "Here, be a dear and get this for me."

Wanting to snarl but remembering his resolution to not get riled up again, he reluctantly gripped it with his teeth and tossed the trash into the garbage before reprimanding her. "I know you're cleaning from the _goodness of your heart,_" he almost spat out the words but kept cool, "but you can't just barge into my room! It's _my room!_"

"Yes, and you hideously neglect your chores." Clicking her tongue in disappointment, something he was sick of hearing, Ho-oh turned to face him and seemed to notice his displeasure at her intruding. She gave a subdued sigh and slowly shook her head. "Oh, alright, I'll leave the rest to you. I suppose you'll have to learn to clean _sometime._ _I'm_ certainly not going to do it all of the time."

He scoffed, mumbling, "Well, _good._ I don't _want_ you to be here all of the time."

She gave him a curious look as she collected her cleaning supplies and shuffled towards the door, and as he stepped aside to let her through she paused. "_Actually_, Dialga, I've made up my mind."

He blinked. "Come again?"

She turned to face him, placing the supplies on the ground momentarily. "If you believe your lifestyle is perfectly fine . . ." She raised her beak and gave a small smile. "You're so proud about it that I want to see it for myself." When it didn't seem to sink in immediately, she clarified, "I'm staying here until I've fixed you up for the big day."

"_What?!_"

* * *

Dialga glumly watched as the microwave reheated the leftovers of the dinner from the night before. "I hate my life."

His brother stepped into the room just as he said that, and he asked curiously, "Why's that?" He had a pillow and blanket under one arm that he was preparing for himself, since he had given up his room to Ho-oh for her stay. He was going to be sleeping on the couch, meaning now he was never going to leave it–he spent so much time there watching his soaps, and this was just an excuse to stay in front of the television.

Dialga scowled and snapped, "Why do you think?" He glared at the food as if it was the source of all of his problems, but in reality he was imagining he had stuffed Ho-oh into the microwave and was watching her cook like Thanksgiving dinner. He opened the door when there were twenty seconds left on the timer, testing the temperature before figuring that was enough and taking it out carefully. He took the plate to the table before he noticed his brother staring at him, and he growled, "What?"

After a moment, Palkia shrugged. "Just wondering how to cheer you up, without killing anyone."

"Then it's not possible," the Temporal Pokemon muttered, watching the steam rise from the plate before leaning down and beginning to eat. Having no hands meant no using utensils, so he just had to submerge his face into the food and eat that way. He hated to admit he envied his brother's hand-like claws, but it would have made a lot of things simpler for him. He would live, though.

Palkia shrugged again. "If you say so." Then, after watching him eat his pitiful dinner, the pink dragon suggested, "Hey, the spoof of that zombie movie is on. Wanna watch it?"

"What, _Resident Evil Code: Chikorita_?" Dialga thought it over, remembering what he had heard from the other legendaries about the movie. "Eh, I guess. It's not like I have anything better to do, anyways." Finishing his dinner, he followed the Spacial Pokemon to the living room and settled himself on the couch as the movie's beginning credits ended. The opening scene showed a rather confident Roserade raiding a base, and Dialga felt a sadistic pleasure when her world fell apart at the seams.

"What are you two–oh, _Resident Evil._" He was surprised to look over his shoulder and see Ho-oh watching the television screen, resting her "chin" on the back of the couch. "You're both such _boys._"

Palkia grinned. "Yep. Wanna watch it with us?" He ignored Dialga's glare as he gave the bird a curious glance.

Mulling it over briefly, the bird tilted her head to the side in what he supposed to be a shrug. "Sure, why not?" Choosing to stand behind the couch instead of the seat offered to her, she was curiously quiet as the movie progressed, even through the several jumpy moments attempting to scare you. As the two dragons laughed at the hilarious deaths, she remained silent up until the last scene where the Roserade ended up dying for some reason. She frowned and asked, "Wait, was that in the original?"

Palkia shook his head and reminded her, "This _is_ the spoof, so they _have_ to mess everything up."

"Hm. I guess you're right." Then, she yawned unexpectedly and lifted her head from the couch, wincing as she got out of the position she had been in for well over an hour. "Ooh, I'm tired. Good night, boys."

"Good night." Taking the remote control to turn off the television, he caught his brother's glare after Ho-oh had left the room. "What?"

Dialga scowled. "Don't be nice to her! You'll encourage her!"

Palkia gave him a mischievous grin. "Oh, and I wouldn't want to do that, now, would I?"

* * *

_I hope you enjoyed this chapter! It was fun to write, to say the least. ;P Read and review, if you please!_

* * *

_Lots of dragon-y love (and cookies!),  
~DL ("Dragon Lover")_


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